Fasting Update

Hi! So it's the 10th day of Ramadhan, and so far im doing good. Except for the fact that i ate tons today, and i freaking took my sahur! Damn i feel like a fat pig. It's already 11:25am and i am still bloated of eating just now. Why did i even eat?! Ugh. My goal was supposed to be:

1. Fit and toned body
2. Lose fat all around
3. Core abs
4. Feminine muscles (LOL)

But it never seem to happen. Well, i lost around 5 pounds and thats good. But the fact that my muscles aren't building up (except my leg part) is devastating. I want abs! But well, #neversaynever!

Oh you see this babe up here? See her smokin' hot body? I want a body like that! Not fat, not skinny, but fit and toned. God isnt she hot? And im here, typing and eating JCo's. Brb wanna take more donuts LOL i joke. And i know, to get abs and all that i have to eat really, really healthy. Maybe im not ready for that yet, because i love food like duh. So yeah. Maybe next time. But i will still try.

I am lame and i have nothing to say. Bye! <3

God these donuts are fattylicious!

Vices + Virtues

Why, hello thur lovely earthlings! I'm bored. Lol i is always bored so this is one of my blogging-because-im-bored-but-i-aint-a-good-blogger-like-maria-elena entries. Forever lame = Me. But whatever, being lame is one of a kind, very unique and special. I like being special, so the spotlight is on me LOL forever perasan.

Oh, see this girl up here? She's pretty. Like very pretty lah. Look at her hair face lips noce eyes body shoulders eyelashes cheeks ears and blabla just see everything lah! Isn't she pretty? If you said she's not then youre dumb. Hehehe. I love her hair. Omg in fact, i want her hair! But like, pfft yeah right as if i can have a hairstyle like that LOL FOREVER PERASAN.

Ish why am i so lame lah today. I got nothing to blog about kldjksaldjakld always like this i wanna die lol joke okthanksbye! <3

Bonjour!

I hope the title's right, because im not good in French. #lolwhut

So uhm, as you can see (well, i mean no one because no one reads my blog pffsh) i changed my blogger look. I got tired of the old one, so why not make changes, right? Oh and it's not done yet. I mean, it's in a mess, and im stupid, i dont know how to make my blog private like omg thats lame. I'm lame. Lame is cute. I'm cute.

I dont know what else to blog about, since im not a good blogger and i have school in about 30 minutes and i just woke up, still in my pjs; I AM DEAD. My family is gonna be fat after they eat me. Good luck with that. Kbye <3

Starting off fresh. Again.

Hi. So uhm, well, im feeling a lil bit emo tonight. I dont know. But whatever forget it. I sound so lame when i say this kasjdskldjaskldjasl whatever whatever.

So today's the first day of Ramadhan in 2011. August 1, it is. Which happened to be, my 14th birthday. I'm not so sure whether im lucky to have my birthday today or the other way 'round. But for me, it sucks because it's not as same as it's supposed to be.

Today sucked. I swear it did. All i did was, cry. And cry. And overdose. And made myself feel high. Took tons of Prozac. 28 pills, 20mg each. So total i took 560mg in a day. Again. Did that once, got myself admitted into the emergency ward. But now i feel like dying. I know, i know, i sound so dramatic now. But you just dont get what im going through right now. I thought i already recovered from my depression and anorexia, but i guess i was wrong. I AM STILL HAVING THEM. Just that, i dont look that i do have them. Outside, i seem to be happy and all that but when im alone, no one sees me cry. 

I am feeling a lil' bit drowsy and i feel like vomiting. Hopefully i'd be dead by tomorrow but whatever. Ciao.